One of the hardest things for me is having JD's grave so far away. I know that it is just his physical body there and that his spirit is not restricted to the grave. But, I have such a desire and a longing to go to his grave. I am his mother and because I am not able to be with him or raise him, I feel like I should at least go to his grave and take care of that. I feel cheated that I can't take care of him, so I should take care of where his little body is resting.
This was the first Christmas after he died and we had gone to Idaho for Heather's wedding. On our drive back on Christmas day, we stopped to decorate his grave.
Visiting his grave is a good thing for me. I always worry that I'm going to be an emotional wreck, but I usually find it calming and peaceful.
I have pictures but they are on a computer I can't get to work right now. Hopefully I can get them soon.
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